The Committee

"The Committee"

Hi Everyone!

Today's picture seems to fit the title for this column - the committee! Doesn't that look like a committee of butterflies deciding whether or not the fruit on the platter is suitable for eating?

My question for you today, though, doesn't pertain to butterflies. It's about "the committee" you sometimes allow to take up residence in your head. You know the one..."You'll never be able to do that" or "Can you believe what THEY did to me?" or "Why can't I do - or be - or have" or whatever...

And the committee can also get very vocal about how you perceive what's happening in your life. For example, within weeks of her last birthday, a friend of mine started talking about how old she would be on her next birthday - and in doing so, she is not only losing this entire year, but she has now convinced herself that she's old and may not have much time left. Perhaps if she focused more on her current age or especially the fact that she actually feels pretty good, she might find daily life more enjoyable. The trouble is, that darned calendar reminds her that, indeed, she is aging every day. But we are all aging every day, aren't we? The more we focus on that, though, the more we remind ourselves of all the little - and not so little - aches and pains we are "enjoying" at this stage of life.

Or maybe your age is significantly lower than my friend - and you focus on all the things you haven't experienced - or can't afford - or wish you could do...  That "future focus," of course, robs you of today - and it will rob you of tomorrow's "today" too.

Another friend is going through an absolutely horrible health experience - you know the one...the one that starts with the dreaded "c" word. He has cancer and is going through a very strong round of chemo. For several weeks he has been talking about the toxins and poisons they will be putting into his body. The other day, we discussed that it might be mentally healthier for him (and perhaps even physically healthier) if he decided that what is going into his body is a very strong medicine and that although the medicine may make him feel bad, it has to be that strong to kill the cancer cells.

You see, "experts" have studied how our mind influences what we actually experience in our lives. We're all familiar with the placebo effect, when whether or not a patient is taking the actual medicine in the study or a sugar pill, if that person thinks they are taking the medicine, they often get better. The sugar pill obviously doesn't have the same benefits as the medicine and yet our minds can convince us otherwise - and our bodies actually react to what our minds are telling us.

Ah...and there's the problem. Our bodies react to what our minds are telling us. And our minds react to what our minds are telling us - through negative thoughts, feelings, emotions - and ACTIONS - based simply on what "the committee" is insisting is the truth in this situation, whether or not it actually is the truth.

But I'll 'fess up here - overruling the committee can be really hard. After all, it's "them against us" and there's only one of us! But believe me when I tell you that it is WORTH fighting the committee's negativity. You'll feel better emotionally and sometimes even physically.

So what do you say? Let's FIRE THE COMMITTEE!!

Let me know if you're able to do that - I know you'll be glad you did!

Blessings,

Linda

www.LindasWorkshops.com

Linda@LindasWorkshops.com  

Priorities

Greetings, everyone!

Today's word is taken directly from a webinar series I am currently conducting, titled "Managing Your Priorities."

Although the webinar series pertains to time management, I think we could all take a step back and do a bit better in how we handle our life priorities. I personally tried to do that by going on vacation as I mentioned a few weeks ago. The picture above shows exactly what my priorities on vacation were - peace and quiet!! It was very important to me to have some real downtime on vacation - and we found a spot where I could do just that.

And since we've been back, my priorities have shifted once again. I've been on several overnight business trips recently, which require me to focus on details, details, details. Hotels, directions, where and when to eat - mundane things really, but priorities nonetheless when I'm traveling. When I'm back in the office, I am focused on making sure I have all of my programs ready for upcoming workshops - and that the content of those programs is just what the participants will need for that topic.

On a day-to-day basis though, I can lose sight of my "life" priorities. A whole day can go by and I haven't given my doggie or kitty the pats and pets they deserve. Or maybe I haven't given my husband the hug he deserves for being such a good friend and cheerleader. 

Sometimes, I don't prioritize eating right or exercising - which results in my health not being a priority. Of course, when chocolate is such a big priority, it's hard to worry about eating right :-)!

Sometimes it's rest - I stay up too late or allow my mind to whirl in a hundred different directions as I'm trying to go to sleep. And again, my health can suffer. 

Sometimes it's my attitude that needs priority attention and that's one thing that can slip without me even realizing it. That, then, can affect other priorities - trying to be kind, compassionate, caring...instead of disgruntled, irritated, or moody.

Whatever your "life" priorities need to be, I hope you'll take a few minutes to see where you stand regarding those priorities. And I hope you'll re-prioritize if you need to. 

When we have our priorities straight, so many other aspects of our lives benefit. I'm going to keep working on getting it right - how about you?? 

Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com

Decisions, Decisions

Hi everyone!

I hope you've had a fabulous summer and are eagerly anticipating a nice crisp, clear fall...that's what we're hoping for here in Florida.

Today's word, as you can see, is "decision." You can also see I made a "decision" to add Grover, our handicapped kitty, to the hall of fame known as my blog posts. He gets mentioned a lot, but he's not always photogenic, so finding great pictures of his handsome face is not always easy. I think this one shows his inner beauty, though...

And on to today's word...I was thinking about how many decisions we make on a daily basis - what time to get up, what to have for breakfast, exercise or not, what to wear, which route to take to work, which tasks to tackle first, whether or not to stop for groceries on the way home, which bills to pay this week, what to have for dinner, good china or everyday dishes, load the dishes into the dishwasher or wash by hand, what to watch on TV, what time to go to bed...as you can see, I could go on and on to the point of ridiculousness! But think about it...we do actually make that many decisions and dozens more - every. single. day.

And yet...when it comes to deciding how we want our lives to move forward, we tend to avoid that at all costs. Each 24-hour period that slips by is gone forever. As dramatic as that sounds, it's true.

The question is, what did you REALLY decide today? Did you decide to be angry at the person who cut you off in traffic? Did you decide to be irritated with your co-worker...or your boss? Did you decide to spend money you don't really have because it made you feel better - for about 91 seconds?? Did you decide to eat something you know you shouldn't eat because yummmmm, it tastes so good - and then feels so bad when you see the number on the scale?

Or did you, friends, decide that today is too important to choose a negative attitude? Because decisions are all about choices, aren't they? Are your decisions bringing you joy, happiness, and peace?

Let me know - I'd love to hear what you've "decided!"

Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com
Linda@LindasWorkshops.com

Vacation!

Ahhhhh...vacation! A time for rest and relaxation, right? How many of you have ever felt like you needed a vacation from preparing for vacation?? That's how I feel right now as I prepare for an upcoming vacation followed quickly by a 4-day business trip. I know the vacation will be great once I'm there, but the "getting there" can be quite taxing :-). The squirrel in the above picture must be feeling about the same, LOL.

As I was thinking about my upcoming vacation from "work," I thought about how we might want to step back occasionally and see if we need a vacation from something else...

Is worry weighing you down? Is there a problem or situation you've been worrying about for awhile? As we know, worry doesn't really solve anything, although it's close cousin, "constructive reflection" can help us work through things sometimes. Maybe it's time to just stop - time to take a worry vacation -even for just a few minutes - where you just soak in the moment, enjoying the sunshine or the pretty purple flower outside your window or even just enjoying the contented look on your kitty's face as he sleeps.

Do you need a vacation from anger? YIKES! That's a scary thought, isn't it? Yet some of us carry anger with us as if it's our JOB - and we all know we perform much better when we take vacations from our jobs. So....stop the anger.

Maybe it's being judgmental of others that you need a break from. Someone isn't doing enough at work, doesn't dress the way they "should," talks too loud, or whatever...just stop. Again, it doesn't solve anything and just keeps you aggravated about the situation.

Have you been comparing yourself or your life - unfavorably - with someone else lately? Your finances, your home, your car, your hair color - whatever! Comparison steals contentment - so just stop.

Just as a "real vacation" is sometimes hard to schedule and enjoy, a vacation from emotions can be challenging, too. The thing is, we have to DECIDE to take the vacation, don't we?

So...what will you decide to take a vacation from?? Drop me a note and let me know!

Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com
Linda@LindasWorkshops.com

Seasons...

Greetings everyone...

Well, here in Florida, we are just starting to feel a change of seasons - for about 9.3 minutes per day ;-)  In the early mornings, if I am standing in the shade and there's a breeze, the breeze hints that there are cooler days ahead. In the evenings, I can feel those cooler days getting closer. It's time for a new season.

Sometimes it's time for a new season in life, isn't it? And if you're like me, you might not be ready - or you may even be denying that it's coming.

We just experienced a season like that. Murphy, our 16-year old rescued kitty, died on August 22 and I have to face a new season without him. He slept with me (I know some won't approve, but he was my buddy!), he worked on my desk with me (and sometimes drove me crazy bumping up against the computer to get my attention), and he spent quiet time with me most mornings. The void is noticeable.

Murphy had shown signs that he was slowing down, so it was easy to deny that he was also losing weight and having a few "off" days now and then. He played just 2 nights before we said goodbye. In my mind, I convinced myself that he was still the same, young and ornery, and that we had a lot of years left. But somewhere deep in my heart, I knew he was going downhill. The occasional blood tests were showing signs of some ailments that kitties don't recover from. Still, I did not want to face this new season.

As we've said goodbye to Murphy, we've said hello to Brody, our rescued Australian shepherd. Thankfully, he has made me smile at some point every single day since we adopted him. Sometimes the smiles from Brody come through the tears about Murphy. That's how seasons work, I guess. There are good things and sometimes some not-so-good things about the seasons we go through in life.

There are seasons where we feel financially secure, or relatively healthy and fit, or deeply satisfied with our work - or our relationships - or our cars - or our homes - or our                ...

However you fill in that blank, I'll bet you agree that there are also times when we aren't all that thrilled with the current season. 

So what should we do? Hide until it passes? That didn't work so well the last time I tried it! Instead, we need to be in the moment - recognize a season for what it is...a season. A period of time that eventually passes - whether we want it to or not. 

And maybe while we're living in this season, we can also look foward to the new season that's coming just as sure as that cooler weather carried on the breezes here in Florida.

What season are you struggling with? Can you picture the new season waiting for you? Maybe your new season doesn't actually bring a change in circumstances - maybe it just brings a change in you - peace, joy, contentment...whatever this season has been missing. May you find it as you experience this particular season.

Blessings,

Linda

www.LindasWorkshops.com

Linda@LindasWorkshops.com

Perspective

Hi everyone,

Today's word has so many "perspectives," doesn't it??

So many things happen in our lives every day that can affect our perspective. Maybe we're worried about that huge unexpected car repair bill, then we remember that there are those who can't afford bus fare.

We are irritated about waiting too long in the doctor's office for our yearly appointment, then talk to a friend who was just diagnosed with cancer.

We complain about the heat (don't we always, fellow Floridians??) then hear about the horrible mudslides in Colorado, typhoons in the Philippines, or even the awful sinkhole that just swallowed an apartment building only an hour away!

We fuss about friends and relatives who don't make the effort to stay in touch, then we read about Tripp Halstead who continues to fight every day to overcome a traumatic brain injury. That family is thankful he's alive, even though he can't communicate with them.

We complain about too much work, then read yet another story about the thousands of people who can't find a job.

We bemoan the fact that we need to go to the gym to exercise, then realize how fortunate we are that we are healthy enough to do so.

We wince when we think about all the home repairs and chores that need done, then realize how wonderful it is to have a place to call home.

Last night, I stretched out on the bed with the lights off, just to take a deep breath. It was DARK - and quiet. In that nearly totally darkened room, I couldn't help thinking about how precious my sight is. I pondered how thankful I am to be able to hear the faint sound of the air conditioning unit (thankful for the hearing AND the a/c!).

So...the next time you realize your perspective might be a bit off-kilter, stop and think about what someone else's perspective might be of your situation. You might just find yourself thankful for your particular "lot in life." Let me know if you do!

Blessings,

Linda

www.LindasWorkshops.com

Linda@LindasWorkshops.com  

Patience



Brody - still "worried," but home at last

 Hi everyone,
Yes, I do take my own advice from time to time ;-)

Last time, we talked about using caution when making decisions in life or using caution about letting certain aspects of our lives affect our self-worth (such as our jobs).

I also mentioned that we would soon be driving 2 hours to see some rescued dogs and we wanted to use caution in deciding if it really is time and who should be chosen.

When we arrived at the event, there were several dogs - but only 3 of them were adoptable...and 2 were chihuahuas. Cutest little things! But at 5 months old, they were quite fidgety. We didn't feel ready to take on a couple of "tiny toddlers." And we're really "big dog" people. So I sat and petted the only other option available. I was pretty sure HE wasn't the one, because we were looking for a girl, with the beautiful merle coloring of a typical Aussie. But as I watched how patient he was with everyone and everything happening around him, it started to dawn on me that his was the type of calm personality that we needed if we were to add a dog to our family of 2 kitties. We stayed for 90 minutes and during that time he never snapped, growled, or even frowned at any of the other dogs - even blind and deaf Rose, who was crawling all over him, or the chihuahuas who were always prancing around somewhere near him.

But we left. We wanted to make sure we were thinking it through logically. Well, logically, he is very calm. Logically, he may be difficult to adopt out because he doesn't have the flashy colors or blue eyes of a lot of Australian shepherds - so we may be his best bet. Logically, he's already probably 3 years old and most people want puppies or "juveniles." Logically...the timing seemed right after 3 unsuccessful attempts to adopt in the past five months.

When we found out his background - living at the end of a chain for most of his life, turned in to a high-kill shelter, rescued from there but placed with 3 different foster families in 5 months...well, logically - this boy needed us ;-). So after I returned home from a business trip last Saturday night, we made the decision to drive to Tampa again on Sunday to adopt Brody.
Best. Decision. Ever.

I am happy to say that our caution and patience were rewarded with what seems to be the perfect fit for us. He is gentle and huggable. He's still a bit "worried" about whether or not this is his forever home, but after seeing his new toys, balls, cookies, treats, and TWO large dog beds, I think he's figuring out that he's here to stay.

I wish I could say I use that kind of caution in all of my important decisions. Sometimes I THINK I'm using caution when really I'm just taking time to talk myself into or out of something. But this has taught me that even when we rightly proceed with caution, sometimes we have to take a leap of faith. Is there an area in which you need to proceed with caution? Or are you holding back so much so that you'll never make the decision? Is it time to take a leap of faith?

And PATIENCE - oh my! This is definitely not my strong suit, as evidenced by trying to adopt 3 other dogs in  the past 5 months. And I struggle particularly with being patient with people - and sometimes with being patient with myself! Do you need to become more patient? In what areas do you struggle with that? Your boss? Spouse? Kids? Friends? Pets? Neighbors? Parents? Employees? Strangers????  The list can get quite long, can't it? How about we make a pact to practice patience for the next couple of weeks? I suspect we'll all find that our lives are calmer and more enjoyable...and I'll vote for that!

Drop me a note and let me know how you're being tested in the areas of caution or patience. The need for either or both of those in our lives can pop up quite frequently...we might as well pay attention!

Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com
Linda@LindasWorkshops.com