Challenges...

Brody's graduation :-) 

 

Hi everyone,

 

Well, you can see by the look on Brody's face that he found the whole "graduation" thing a challenge! He has been "in school" for close to 5 months with holidays and spring break (lol), but he did pass his AKC Canine Good Citizen test last week. It was a bit of a challenge for him to stay at the end of a 20-foot leash while I walked away, but he did a great job with that and the other 9 pieces of the test. It is a bigger challenge for him to do what I ask when it's something he reallllly doesn't want to do - like get off the chair where we sit together so I can straighten his blanket! And it's a challenge for me to lift him since he now weighs nearly 75#... Our next challenge will be to see if he enjoys therapy work. Our goal is to visit a local hospice or nursing home once a week. It will be up to Brody whether or not we continue to do it after a few test runs. If it is too much of a challenge and it stresses him too much, we will discontinue the project. He's been through too much to stress him out intentionally.

 

Brody is facing somewhat minor challenges, of course. But we all face more major challenges from time to time, don't we? Sometimes it's health-related, as with my husband right now. For the past month, he has been unable to open his mouth far enough to eat. HUGE challenge in keeping his weight up, keeping enough nutrition in him, keeping his energy level up, keeping his temper because of the stress...and keeping my patience, I hate to admit.

 

I have a couple of friends who are facing significant health challenges, too, both related to that dreaded "c" word - cancer. Every day is a challenge to stay positive, to try not to get consumed with what the future might hold. 

 

Sometimes our challenges are relationship-based...whether that's with a significant other, a sibling, a co-worker, an elderly parent, a friend...dealing with other humans can present unique challenges to say the least. 

 

Sometimes the challenge is with finances. Those kinds of challenges can appear overnight with car repairs, household maintenance, helping someone else, medical bills...the list could go on and on.

And sometimes the challenge involves our work - or for some of you, lack thereof. I have friends who are searching for work at an age when they should be planning retirement. Jobs for those of us over a "certain age" can be a challenge. Learning a new job can be a challenge. Finding work that we enjoy can be a challenge. Finding a job that pays enough to allow us to eat can be a challenge. Finding enough work when we are self-employed can be a challenge. 

For me, it's apparently a challenge to keep up with my blog - even though it's something I love. I feel an obligation to stay ahead of my workshop schedule, help my husband, pay bills, shop for groceries, do the laundry...you know, all that "fun stuff"!  So the blog doesn't always get the attention I would like to give it. But I can't beat myself up over it. I have to prioritize so as not to cause myself additional anxiety over what I left undone.

Obviously, what I'm getting at here is that there seems to be no shortage of challenges for most of us. But truly, how we respond often determines whether or not the challenge gets more daunting or we learn to handle it with the least amount of stress. If we focus only on the negative aspects of a challenge, we can pretty well bet that negativity will continue to hound us. If we at least TRY to find the positives, for those brief moments when we are in the "positive zone," things will be easier to handle - and those brief moments might stretch out to not-so-brief moments of being in that zone.

The ultimate challenge, of course, is how do we stay in the positive zone more??

What do you think? How do YOU stay in the positive zone when faced with significant challenges?

Let me know - I love to hear from you!

Blessings,

Linda

www.LindasWorkshops.com

Linda@LindasWorkshops.com

Knowledge

Hi everyone! You might think the title of this post relates to the picture (graduation day, April 14, 2013 - YIPPEEEE!!!) and I guess it could certainly pertain to that. I hope I gained some knowledge over these many months of school work, team meetings, and class time!

But the reason the word "knowledge" came to mind is that I spent some time with a friend yesterday who is a wealth of knowledge (actually, he has a lot of knowledge about wealth, too - he's a wealth management consultant! Alas, I have no need for his services, lol). Whenever I speak with him, we always get into some really interesting discussions and I walk away having learned something new - or at least affirming something I already have strong feelings about. Don't you love it when that happens??

Yesterday we talked about leadership. Since Bryan studies words, he mentioned that leader comes from "lea" = path and "der" = finder. So a leader is a pathfinder. How cool to know that what I've been telling people for years as my own opinion is also traceable back to the roots of the word "leader!"

Something I think people can miss, though, is that you don't have to have a corner office, a gaggle of employees, or a fancy-schmancy title to be a leader. You don't even have to have a job. People in all walks of life, at every level, and those who are not technically employed, can still be leaders.

You can lead people to have a good attitude - by exhibiting one yourself.

You can lead people to take a good look at their negativity by being the person who keeps a positive outlook on things.

You can lead people to act with integrity - because you set the example.

You can lead people to feel good about themselves by being an encourager.

You can lead others to be accountable for their own actions by not allowing them to make excuses for bad behavior.

So...you now have new knowledge of yourself as a leader. What will you do with this knowledge? How can you show your leadership in the next 30 days? Let me know!

Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com
Linda@LindasWorkshops.com

Change...

Ahh, change...it happens everyday, doesn't it? The picture in this post shows a piece of our "backyard" - which really means our tiny patio. We have enjoyed a bit of privacy over the past 7 1/2 years since we moved here courtesy of a rustic wooden fence, which I've thoroughly enjoyed - as have the squirrels and woodpeckers. Over the past few months, it has started to lean precariously and the top has apparently been dinner for any number of said squirrels and woodpeckers, as the boards are about 2" shorter than they were a year ago! It's time for a change - before Mother Nature changes it for us by blowing it down!

So I've been on a quest to replace the fence - which is easier said than done since we live in a community that has numerous restrictions about what you can and can't do to the outside of your home. And believe it or not, I'm fine with that policy. Our community is one of the best-kept in the entire area, due in no small part to the "rules" that are in place. But....it makes it a challenge to take care of this pesky fence issue. Long story short, it looks like we'll have to replace the fence with a "buffer" of plants that will grow fast enough and tall enough to provide some privacy. It will be wonderful - at some point in the future - but it will require finding a landscaper who wants this "small" job and me paying attention to whatever is planted so it doesn't die!

That's just one small change in our lives right now - we have several major ones coming in short order. Guy is closing his music store next week after 5 successful years. Things have changed in the retail environment in that time. There isn't much loyalty to the "local small business" anymore, which is terribly sad. People want to come and play his nice, high-quality guitars so they can go buy one online - ARGH. Or...they bring in the guitar they did buy online so he can put strings on it (hard to pay the retail rent with profit from a set of strings!). Anyway, it's time - he's anxious to get back out on the road, buying and selling, so he's a happy camper in that sense. But still...it will be a significant change having him around more - especially since I work from home and am used to having just Murphy and Grover (the kitties) to aggravate me :-) on a daily basis!

And of course, as some of you know, I'll be graduating from UF with my MBA in just 7 weeks and 2 days - hoooooooooooray!!! That, too, will be a drastic change - no more late night conferences with the team, trying to spur them on to getting our assignments done well - and on time. No more going to campus one weekend a month to sit in classes for 11+ hours on Saturday and another 9+ on Sunday. No more trying to carve out a few hours during the week to read the hundreds of pages of case studies and articles necessary to complete assignments. Wow! What will I do with all that extra time?? HA!

And then there's the new doggie, which we hope we'll find by the first part of May. And we're also hoping she'll have the temperament to become a therapy dog. It's something I've been pondering for awhile and I think it would be very worthwhile - but it will be another change in our "routine" for sure.

Changes will be coming in my work as well, I hope. I love, love, love the training I do, but that, too, is always up in the air with this economy. My clients have been very faithful to me, but they are constantly struggling with funding. My MBA is meant to help me find some classes I can teach online as a complement to my training. That will be fun - but a whole different way of "teaching" people than I'm used to. Change.

And we all experience the small changes in our lives without even realizing it sometimes. Maybe that's the whole point of this post...sometimes we need to take a step back and be grateful for the changes that have made things better - and be grateful, too, for the changes we would rather not have gone through but that are at least OVER :-)

Don't forget, too, to step back and appreciate all the good in your life that hasn't changed for you - whatever that might be...friends, family, hobbies, pets, home....

As the saying goes, "It is what it is, but it will BECOME what you make of it."

Make it GOOD!!!

Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com

Words!

Hi everyone,
Long time, no "write" :-)

I have no excuses - I barely have "reasons!" Life is just flying by and it's hard to imagine that more than 5 months have passed since I've posted.

But you know what? I've decided I'm not going to beat myself up for that. I was so excited about writing frequently when I started my blog. But life not only flies, it sometimes gets in the way of our best intentions. It won't help for me to "yell" at myself for not doing something I really wanted to do. Instead, I've decided my words to myself should be encouraging, just like my words to others.

Several weeks ago, our pastor talked about words being "containers." I love that concept. They can "contain" a positive, upbeat attitude or they can bring on negative thoughts and emotions. I make a real effort to make sure my containers hold something encouraging, uplifting, enthusiastic, positive, helpful, hopeful, etc! - and I succeed a good amount of the time.

That was actually my original intent for the blog. We certainly don't lack for negative words in our environments these days - just turn on any TV show, news channel, radio show, or whatever. Negativity abounds.

But it does NOT have to be that way for US! Will you accept my challenge to try to be aware of what fills your containers? That's my goal for me...when what is in my container becomes polluted with negativity, harsh words, anxiety, or any number of emotions and feelings that don't serve me well, I hope I am aware of it and am able to "change the channel."

So how about it? Will you change the channel the next time your container holds something that isn't good for you?

Here's hoping you do!
Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com

(P. S. No, the cat on the guitar isn't mine, but isn't he adorable??)

Control....hmmmmm

Happy mid-January to you all!

This week's word may have you wondering why I chose it for a "Words to Live By" post. I was thinking about control the other day when I was adjusting the firmness of my side of the bed. Yes, we bought a "sleep number" bed several weeks ago and it gives me the luxury of adjusting the firmness of the mattress I sleep on.

As I adjusted the sleep number to make my side "softer," I thought how nice it would be to be able to adjust the firmness of our lives the same way. After a week of 2 sick animals, a husband with dental and vision issues, my back pain setting up camp, a couple of jobs cancelled and a couple of new ones added - complete with new preparations - I am yearning to "soften" my life for a bit. It's amazing how much "hardness" can come into our lives in such a short period - and let's face it, most of what happened this week is relatively trivial compared to the tragedy in Haiti, those who got devastating news about their health this week, others who are on the verge of losing their homes, etc.

Believe me, I realize that my week was a "walk in the park" compared to others'. And yet...even though we know with our minds that things aren't nearly as difficult as they could be (and maybe have been in the past), still it can all pile up on us at once and life feels hard.

Here's the deal, though - even though we can't control the hardness of our lives (although we do bring some of it on ourselves sometimes), there are things we can control ~

We can control our thoughts, for instance. Yes, I know, sometimes those negative thoughts attack us like a hungry lion and we may not be able to control the initial "attack." We can control how long we decide to hang out with the lion, though - and we can also control what actions we take as a result of the attack. Will we ferociously fight back (and kick those negative thoughts out)? Or will we let the lion hang around and gnaw on us for awhile?

We can control what we say...do you really have to bite back at someone who took a potshot at you? I find it particularly hard to control a response when someone snipes at me in the name of humor - and others laugh. I'm getting better at it now though and I realize it says something about them that they feel the need to say it - and something about me, if I can't resist biting back.

We can control the people we associate with...sometimes we need to distance ourselves from people who don't make us feel very good about ourselves - or even about the world we live in.

We have some control over our physical well-being. Even if we are facing some challenges, we know what we should be eating and doing to at least keep those challenges in check.

We can control what we put into our minds...I do miss some news once in awhile, but I have found that shutting out much of what the media screams about the loudest (which, you gotta admit is usually the negative stuff and something I can do nothing about) helps me to stay on a positive course.

So, what do you need to gain control over? Your thoughts? Your tongue? The people you spend time with? Your physical well-being? What you are putting into your mind?

Whatever it is, you can do it...but it does take awareness and...focus.

So go ahead - be a control freak! And I mean that in the nicest way :-)

Blessings,
Linda
Linda@LindasWorkshops.com
www.LindasWorkshops.com

What are you FOCUSING on?

Hi all,

My apologies for a late post this week. Between a pulled muscle in my back and one of the longest colds in recent memory, my FOCUS was not where it needed to be. Although the muscle is still a pain (literally!), the cold is winding down and it's time to get my focus back to where I want it - a positive look at the new year ahead.

It's so easy to get sidetracked from what we should focus on, isn't it? I try to be a very positive person, so I refuse to focus on the news, violence on TV, etc. Yet everyday happenings such as colds, pulled muscles, car repairs, sick loved ones, cranky co-workers, etc., can take our focus off the joy I mentioned in the last couple of blogs. That's natural and we certainly don't need to beat ourselves up over it. I've never known anyone who added joy by beating themselves up for not focusing on it! What we should do, though, is be aware of how long our focus is distracted or distorted.

For fun (and because I love words!), I looked up "focus" - "a center of activity, attraction, or attention." I'm not a big believer in "attracting whatever I think about" when it comes to tangibles like cash (I wish!), a new car, etc. I am convinced, though, that making the negatives in our lives "a center of activity, attraction, or attention" produces more negatives. If I'm in a bad mood and choose to share that with others, guess what happens? All of a sudden, they are in a bad mood too and now I've multiplied the negativity and REALLY made it hard to get my focus (and theirs) back on a positive note.

I even go so far as to suggest to participants in my "Returning Balance" classes that they should hang around with "YouBet" people instead of "YeahBut" people (can't remember where I heard that years ago, but isn't it a jewel??). You know what I mean - you say, "Isn't the weather beautiful?" and they say, "Yeah, but we need rain." You say, "We really need this rain." and they say, "Yeah, but it's been raining too much." Pretty soon, every thought is followed by "yeah, but" instead of "you bet!"

I don't want to discount the fact that some of us have BIG issues that cause us to lose focus - I have certainly been there/done that, especially over the past 5 years, and have the tee shirts to prove it. I just want to encourage you to take a moment and "reset" your focus now and then. Have a great cup of coffee (Keurig coffeemakers are the greatest!). Watch the snow softly fall (and try not to think about the cold that goes with it!). Read a few pages in a book that brings you pleasure. Have one exquisitely delicious piece of chocolate - and enjoy every moment. Pet the cat (if you can!) or hug the dog (or your significant other - or your child - or a friend - or someone who just needs a hug!).

So here's my question for you this week: What do you find yourself focusing on? Do you focus on what brings you joy or do you focus on all the little things that can so easily keep us in a negative mindset? Are you a "yeah, but" person or a "you bet!" person??

In other words, take time today and every single day to focus on what brings you joy...

Blessings,
Linda
www.LindasWorkshops.com
Linda@LindasWorkshops.com