Sunday, February 7, 2010


Hi everyone, and welcome to my new "followers" - including you Amy :-)! I know there are those who have not actually signed up as a "follower" but read the posts, and I want to welcome y'all (I'm in Florida now, you know!) as well...

Well, did you do it? Did you get rid of any "clutter" this past week - physical, mental, emotional, visual, whatever?? I did manage to eliminate a bit last week and will continue to work on that this week. Sometimes it seems I get rid of some and twice that much comes tumbling in. My mind is so much calmer when I can keep the clutter in check - no matter which kind of clutter it is.

Now on to this week's word...communication. I conducted a workshop on that topic this week, then came across 2 articles about it, so...that "communicated" to me that I should talk about communication :-)...

In my workshop this week, we talked about several aspects of communication - communication styles, for instance. Are you auditory, visual, or kinesthetic? If you need directions, can you just listen to someone tell you (auditory), do you need a map (visual - that would be me), or can you remember how to get to a place after only being there once before (kinesthetic - actually doing something)? If you understand these 3 styles, it can help a lot when you are communicating with others. For instance, knowing that I'm visual, if you wanted to explain some numbers to me, drawing a graph or colorful chart would go a long way in helping me "see" what you're talking about. The auditory person, along with actually hearing what you have to say, might also like to hear how you got the numbers and details. The kinesthetic person might be more focused on the feelings connected to the numbers. Let's put it another way - if you are training someone who is auditory, they can often follow your instructions just based on what you say; the visual may need to see a diagram or written instructions; the kinesthetic needs to actually do it to "get it." Most of us are a combination of all 3 and the more even we are in the 3 styles, the easier it is to communicate with others. If we are high in one category, it just means we have to work a little harder to get our point across - if we are even AWARE that there is a difference in our own communication style and that of the person we're talking to.

Studying the communication styles can be really interesting. My favorite part of the communication workshop, though, is the "listening skills" section. I truly believe that if people take that section to heart they can dramatically improve their lives and maybe the life of someone else. It's amazing how I have never had anyone get a perfect score on the listening survey we take in my workshops, and yet most people don't make any effort to improve in that area. It's an area I have worked on for the past several years and I still have a long way to go.

So here's my challenge to you for this week...pick someone you don't normally listen to all that well (admit it, you probably do have someone in your life like that!) The next time they start a conversation, stop what you're doing, make eye contact, and really listen. Listen to what they are NOT saying. "Listen" to what their eyes are saying. Listen as if they matter...because guess what? They DO. And when you don't listen, you're saying they don't.

I don't think that's what you're really trying to communicate, is it?


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