Saturday, June 12, 2010

Confession


Hi everyone,


I hope somewhere in last week's jam-packed week you found contentment...


Well, they say that confession is good for the soul ~ so I'm going to confess to you today. There were moments last week when I did not feel contentment. It wasn't that I was comparing my home, clothes, finances, or car to anyone else. So comparison really wasn't the issue. It's just that last week, life was ... well, hard. Not as hard as it has been in other times and certainly not as hard as many people have it.


It was just a week of "stuff" ~ Guy having a test done at the hospital and an inconsiderate remark by the technician causing some real depression - for both of us. I'm going to physical therapy twice a week (with the accompanying insurance deductible each visit!) to try to clear up a bum shoulder - and avoid surgery. Some job issues didn't work out the way I had hoped which is not all that unusual since I'm self-employed, just not what I needed last week on top of the other things that were happening. For some reason, I missed Abby (see my post about her from a few weeks ago...) more than ever.


You all (or y'all, as they say here in Florida!) know how it goes. I'm sure you've been there a time or two - and maybe you're even there right now.


But remember a few posts ago when I talked about "moment-by-moment?" Well, that's what I finally remembered toward the end of the week. I had a great time with some folks during an online workshop I conducted on Thursday - and the more I thought about helping some of those people and others I'll help in the future, the better I felt about life in general. The better I felt about life in general, the more I've been able to carry that feeling with me over the last couple of days.


Aha! Confession! I was focusing on me, me, me during the rest of the week, when what I really needed to do was to look around, or at least not look at only me. In this case, I saw that I could help someone else feel better. Granted, a workshop may not seem like a big deal, but since it's what I do for a living and I love it, it helps to know I really do help some people. I carried that feeling back to my "work" when the session was over and somehow it has made a difference. Maybe what really made the difference was that I quit looking only at my circumstances.


I guess what I'm saying is, none of us is perfect in trying to be content, not comparing ourselves to others, living in the moment, or any of the other things we've discussed these past few months. What I have found is that if I confess my feelings to myself and figure out how and why they're happening, I can move forward a little quicker. If I can remember to not focus on me, I can find more contentment... maybe you can too. And of course, as you've heard me say before, it's all about awareness!


Blessings,

Linda


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